Littleneuroticthang

Monday, Monday

Well, since it is Memorial Day I would like to say something about my grandma. She has now been gone for a year and 3 months. Which sometimes I find so hard to believe. I never thought that I could ever miss anyone as much as I miss her.

It saddens me a bit because after many years of not talking to my brother and sister we have finally reconnected this past year and it would have made her so happy. She would have loved to have met my nephew and future niece and nephew who are on their way. She would have been so proud of my brother and sister.
About once a week when she was alive she would ask" have you talked to A. or S.?" It always made me feel horrible to have to say no to her.

She was a feisty little woman who could talk to anyone. She showed her love like any southern woman by food and her cooking. She loved to dress up. She LOVED the color red and big flashy earrings. The bigger, the better.
She was a very stubborn woman and unfortunately so are her daughters and her granddaughters. As I age I see more of her traits coming out of me and it's always a little funny because I use to think I was so different from her.

I was looking through photos yesterday and came across of some from my aunt, whom I haven't spoken to in years. That's because she had a fight with my grandmother and has cut us out of her life. I didn't realize until yesterday how much I miss her and my cousins. I really know that no family is perfect. I just wish mine wasn't so messed up.

But then I feel guilty because I have done the same thing to my other aunt. But I feel that what she did was unforgivable and hopefully I will find it in my heart to forgive her one day.

But I do have to mention that I do have the world's greatest mom. I know that everyone says that but mine truly is. I may have a messed up family but I hit the jackpot when it came to moms. And I have no problem in admitting that I am a total momma's girl. :)

posted by pixie @ 12:28 PM