Blah kinda day.
I am totally skipping class today. Shhhh...don't tell anyone. I really should have gone but I just needed a break. I might go to lecture today. I really haven't decided yet. I probably will. I have so much to do. I hate the final weeks of school.
I read about this group called WAR-Line targeting porn shops in Columbus, OH. They are taking patrons pics and posting them on the net. How messed up is that? They think they are saving women and children from being raped. Sure you are. I mean don't they have better things to with their time? Like maybe helping actual rape victims? Are maybe helping all the hungry and homeless people throughout our country? Nope, first we have to start with the evil Porn. You know because that crap will corrupt faster than you can say Jesus.
I am sad to hear that the Patio is closed. I had some good times in that place. Of course I can't remember the last time that I was actually at the Patio but it sad to hear that is closing. I saw so many friends play there. And now it will probably be turned into some crap pick up bar. Oh, so sad. I must say that I did have some really good times back in the day in Broadripple.
I am also sad to hear that Marsh may be sold. Now that is really heartbreaking. That is an awesome grocery store and something I still miss about Indy. Boo-hoo.
Here's another great thing I read. Apparently Miami is taking an in your face approach to terrorism. It's called "Miami Shield" and they will pick a target, any old building or bus and just do random searches. It's to make terrorist to "think twice" about targeting South Florida. WTF ever. How about um, this thing called a freaking constitution? Have they heard of such a thing? Random search my ass. I may take it at the airport but I will not take a random search. This terrorist thing has gotten way out of line. I hate Bush. What is really surprising is all the Americans out there you are so scared of terrorism. Wake up people. This is just some scare tactic used to take away our rights slowly. If you can't see that, well, I just feel sorry for you.
Countdown!
1. Two more Theory lectures.
2. Two more skills classes
3. One more Clinical day
4. One Clinical evaluation
5. One more Theory Exam
6. One more Pharm exam
7. One Hessie Exam
8. Theory Final
9. Pharm Final
10. Hopefully I move on to next semester!
I really am going to miss my clinical group. They have been a great bunch and there has been no fighting or backstabbing. I think that is really rare when you have all females. I hope my next group is just as good!
| In a Past Life... |
 You Were: A Famous Viking.
Where You Lived: Turkey.
How You Died: The Plague. |
I didn't know that Vikings were in Turkey? How I ironic that it would be Yersinia Pestis that would kill me. I knew there was a reason I hated Micro.
| You Are Mexican Food |
 Spicy yet dependable. You pull punches, but people still love you. |
What Kind of Food Are You?
Well, people do tend to call me fiesty
Well, duh of course I'm 90% American.
| You Are 90% "Average American" |
 You are average because you drink on occasion.
You are not average since you don't think affirmative action is necessary. |
How "Average American" Are You?
Three weeks left
That's all I have left. My final paper is turned in, two more exams, two finals, one procalc, and one Hessie test and the semester is OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!:) I can't believe that my first semester of nursing school is over. It just flew by. I went to a different hospital today. One that mom use to work at. Me and another classmate got to see wound care and Hyber barrack chambers. I saw some pretty nasty wounds today. Yikes. I also got told that I need to smile more. I get so tired of people telling me this. I'm a happy person. I am not sad. I am not pissed off in anyway nor am I in deep thought. I just don't feel liking freaking smiling all the time! jeez. I mean how many people go around with grins on their faces anyway? I mean, it's not like I don't smile. WTF??
It was nice spending time with baby's family Saturday night. His sister bought him a birthday cake because his niece wanted to surprise him with one. She is so sweet. On the way home from dinner she wanted to sit next to me. Hehe. I heart his nieces. Then me and his sister stayed up until 3 talking. I think it's the first time that we have actually gotten to chat by ourselves. I really like his sister. I wish they lived closer.
I think we are just going to have Christmas dinner by ourselves. His family really doesn't celebrate, I mean why would they? I put up my tree and have a couple of decorations on it. I am just going to take my time this year. Last year I had it done by Thanksgiving night. Not this year. I still need to make out my Christmas cards and Christmas shopping list. I'm going to make some reindeer mix this year. That stuff is oh, so yummy. I might even make some cookies. I don't know. We'll see how I'm feeling after schools done. I do have guest coming right after Christmas so I will be cooking a lot then. Well, I need to get some studying in. Ciao.
Drowning
Thanksigiving was quite nice. I went over to his Aunt's house and his sister is down from NY. He has the cutest nieces. I made two pumpkin pies and a batch of deviled eggs. I'm always self conscious about my cooking because my idiot ex was picky eater who didn't like anything. But I got rave reviews on my pumpkin pie. I had people telling me they never like pumpkin pie but they had two pieces of mine. That was cool. And the eggs were a big hit too. It was a good holiday.
I was going to go to masjid yesterday and of course they were painting my balcony railing so I didn't want to get in the shower. Well, right when I was about to jump in baby calls me and tells me that he left a key in his car that I need to bring over. So, I had to miss which really upset me because I had to miss last week and I can't go next week.:( To top it off the bi$% didn't even buy the car. GRRRRR........
I am so stressed right now. I only have three weeks of school left and they are the toughest. I have so much to do. I feel like a rubber band that is going to break at any moment. I have been yelling at baby way to much lately and I feel horrible. I keep having nightmares. Last night's features were I came home and everything was gone. Then I had another were my clinical instructor turned into a vampire. Not good. I'm just so scared right now. I don't know why, just am. I guess everyone goes through this. I've got good grades but I am just so scared of not getting a satisfactory in my skills or clinical!
Only one more day left!
And it is the official start of the holiday season! Time to start buying those Christmas presents that won't make it on time. Well, I have so many packages sitting by my door that still haven't gotten where they are suppose to be, so you know. I am going to start on my cards tomorrow and I'm making pies for Dinner and deviled eggs. Woo-Hoo! I told baby that he gets to go see the Nutcracker with me this year. He tried to get out of it but no go. I didn't get to go last year. It just doesn't feel like Christmas without it! I am excited to see a new performance. For the last couple of years I had been going to Butler University to see it. They do an amazing performance. The sets were donated by some troop in Chicago and they were spectacular.
I am also putting up my Christmas tree this weekend! Hopefully they get done painting my apartment soon so I can put up my lights. I decided to put lights around the balcony this year. Well, see how that goes.
Clinicals were cut short today. Not that I'm complaining. I got to go eat lunch with baby then go home take a shower and I just woke up from a great nap. I have so much studying to do tonight. I have a Pharm. test tomorrow. At least I don't have to go Thursday! It was one of those "crappy" days where every patient had a bm problem. Oh, what joy those are!
Baby bought Caez a toy. How cute is that? Of course Caesar loves it, the brat. Of course when I buy him a toy it just sits there.
Old married couple
That's how I'm feeling right now! We were suppose to go out last night. I actually had no desire. I have been so exhausted and had so much to do. I mean, we don't go out until 12 or 1 and don't get in until 6 or 7. So I would have wasted away a day that I don't need to waste. I have Christmas break for that! Well, he promised V. that he would go out. So he said we'll get something to eat and then I will just go downtown and come home around 3 or 4. Yeah, I so knew that wasn't going to happen. We both were asleep by 1. Oh so sad.
It was raining super bad last night and I am hearing someone screaming "HELP!". I keep looking outside and don't see anything. So I go back to watching TV because he is looking at me like I'm nuts. I kept hearing it and it was driving me crazy! Then he comes upstairs and says "look outside, there are two cats on the pool screen." I look, they are two raccoons fighting! Crazy bastards. They were gone this morning but they were at it all night. I told him I must speak raccoon. :) I think one of them comes by a lot because I am always hearing footsteps on the roof. I thought it was my overactive imagination but turns out it's just a raccoon.
Ms. Grouch
I have been such a grouch the last couple of days. I don't know why. Today has really just sucked and I am glad it is almost over with. But then tomorrow will be another busy day of to much to do and never enough time. I guess I just need to cut my sleep down to three hours???
1. woke up late, didn't even have time to wash my hair. I looked oh, so beautiful today.
2. had a diet coke for breakfast
3. Took a Pharm test
4. Had crappy fries from the cafeteria
5. Studied like crazy for my Theory test, don't know how I even got a good grade on it. I guess I just rock like that:) ha
6. Almost passed out in the computer room while taking my test because lack of food. Ugh. My professor was like "are you ok? you look a little pale". Not good. I really need to start taking better care of myself.
Baby brought me food because he knows when I am studying I don't eat. That boy and his family are always trying to stuff food down me. I also need to go to the doctor. I ran out of Synthroid and I should know better. My regular doctor won't write a script till have I have blood work done. What the hell would be the point? I can tell you my levels are not going to be normal, so why the hell am I going to waste money? I need a new doc.
My friend L. just had her baby!!!! He is a beautiful baby boy. He is so freaking adorable. I wish I could be there. I hate that I proabably won't see this baby until he's like 20. Grrrr.... I hate living so far away from my friends. I really need to make time this summer to see everyone. I guess I will try to make it Race weekend. I already promised C. It will be so good to see everyone.
I sent out some funny forwards yesterday and someone that I haven't spoken to wrote back, "stop emailing me you good for nothing whore!!!!". WTF?????? I mean I was SHOCKED!!!! You just couldn't say, please stop with the crap? I mean I don't even write him personal emails. This is someone I just hung out with, never dated, never wanted to because he just wasn't my type. I haven't even spoken to him since August. And he was the one to call me. I mean I have been called worse but I was just flabbergasted because it came out of nowhere. I didn't even bother replying. If that is how you communicate when you are 34, all I can feel for you is pity.
Well, I think I am going to order me some pizza. I haven't had any in oh, so long. I might try to study or try to clean my apartment. It isn't looking so good right now. Oh, the wonderful world of nursing school.
Mondays, how I hate thee
I am in a funk. I have no clue why but I need to snap out of it. I am not depressed, just so tired. I feel like I have no energy. Ugh, and I have three case studies, a paper and two test all due Wed. What fun!!!! And guess what? I just don't care!!!!
I went to the OR today. Pretty interesting. Didn't pass out didn't feel queasy at all! Woo-HOO!!! Was a little afraid that I would because this is the one day that I didn't freaking eat breakfast.
OK, I will GET MOTIVATED! What's my motivation? Only 5 MORE WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm a little sad that I missed my lil sis's baby shower. I have her birthday gift, a friends birthday gift, numerous cards and baby clothes to send out. I am such a slacker. What to know how bad it is? I ran out of soap today. Miss stock up queen ran out of soap! I had to use freaking bubble bath. I should of known it was going to be one of those days.........
Hate
It saddens me that there is still so much of this around. Really, I know I talk a bunch of crap but when does it become alright to say that it is ok to wipe another race out? In this day and age you have no one to blame if you don't help yourself. There are opportunities out there for work and there is birth control and the popular "just don't do it method" if you don't believe in birth control. Nothing should be handed down to you.
I get tired of people thinking I get handed down things. Yes, I don't work. So I am doing things a little different. Hello, I was out of the house at 18 taking care of myself. My mom would have helped me go to school at 18 if I had let her but I had to figure things out on my own. I had to arrive here on my own time. I'm sorry if you can't grasp that around your brain. And no I did not have a boyfriend who "took care of me".
I also feel pity for the tons that have been brainwashed into thinking that western civilization is evil and we must therefore be wiped out. And they feel the need to treat their women like second class citizens. When kings have more money than they know what to do with and there are poor and suffering in their country.
I feel for the people that actually believe that Islam is a religion of hate because of what some crazy people do. Wake up people. Like Muslims are the only ones going around harming people. Christians, Jews and many others harm others to. No religion is perfect.
And for the love of G-d Pat Robertson! When did G-d come down to you and make you the all knowing? Really, I would like to know? To tell a town that they will get no help from G-d? I think some people really need to some more schooling in the art of Christian love. I wonder if those words would ever come out of Jesus mouth? I wonder if he thinks we should take out the president of Venezuela?
I just get tired of all the fighting sometimes. I wish people would reflect upon themeselves before they start condemning people to hell. Sorry this as been such weird post but people wear me out sometimes. They really do. I now realize why people become hermits. It isn't because they don't like people, they just can't take it anymore.
Caesar one strange kitty indeed.
I am going to post a pic of him soon. This cat will eat anything. I am eating some Rabbit food and he sits here patiently waiting for some. He apparently loves hummus. And he likes Soy burgers. I just don't know about this cat.
Wasted Time
Well, I have wasted two hours that I can never get back. I am complaining to the Florida Turnpike. I want my freaking two dollars back!!!!!!!! Grrrrrrrr......Seriously, when did traffic become this bad? I was talking to one of my buddies and he knows a couple of people who are moving down here. NO! I want to have a sign at the border that says FULL, Sorry try back later.
Then I wasted another 30 min. waiting at Honda for the girl who had Z. tags. If you are going to say you are going to have them ready, fucking have them ready. Then the sales guy had no idea what the hell I was talking about. Dude, you called and said the fucking tags were ready. GAH! Then the girl was like well, I shouldn't even have them ready until I get the money. WTF? It's 16 fucking dollars lady! I called baby so he could give them his credit card. I had no money or anything on me. His cousin owes me big!!!!! I would have never been in traffic for two hours. Blah.
Things I did today that will bore you:
1. Instead of studying for my skills lab, fell asleep in my car
2. Had a study session with my study group
3. Turned in a really crappy wellness paper
4. Had a really crappy dinner from Taco Hell
5. Learned how to play with needles and IV bags!!!!!!
6. Totally killed a poor orange.
7. Decided to run for secretary for the Student nurse's Association
8. Fell asleep in lecture with my eyes open
9. Wanted to kick a zillion people in the face (great bedside manner I shall have)
10. Found my cat killing my favorite pair of flip flops
My brain hurts and I have some much studying to do. Crap, I think I will clean my house instead. Crap, Crap, Crap.
Waking up Dead
That's how I felt this morning. I missed clinical because I am pretty sure that it would be over with by time I got done crawling there, cause that is all I could to this morning. I thought I felt a little weird yesterday but I had no idea that my internal organs we going to try and escape. I finally talked those pesky things into staying. But I have two test tomorrow and I'm afraid that I will most likely not pass. I didn't open one book. Ok, I tried but it might as well of been in Greek. Let's hope that I didn't lose all of my knowledge today. I actually fell this morning. The whole left side of my body just went numb and down I went. I wonder if I should worry about that? My other half wanted to take me to the doctor but I didn't want to go. My instructor was like is there something that can take care of you? Gosh, what a nurse! hehee.
I went to Endoscopy yesterday. Much better than Radiology. I mean it's still a lot of standing but it is really routine and organized and man do they stay busy. I got to see three colonoscopies, two had polyps removed. It was pretty boring organ. The first Physician was really cool and explained everything. I love when they are like that. This was me " um, what's that green stuff?" Dr. replies, "That's poop." I felt really dumb! Doh!
Ok, I was looking up one of my friends on myspace and out of curiosity decided to look at this guy I use to date. I got a real laugh because not only has he grown taller buy he is younger too! Like they aren't going to notice how old you are when they meet you? Freaking whatever. He actually goes around thinking he looks 25 though. Very sad indeed. I mean I am thinking about telling people I'm really 28(shhhh. I know.) But 25! He looks like he is 35. Made me giggle, ok more like laugh hysterically. I wonder how I dated such a weirdo? EEK. Ok, and the whole thing saying you are 5"10 when you are more like 5"
6 maybe 5'7 so not going to go well with the ladies. Maybe if he had a better personality but my friend was ready to hurt this boy the second time she hung out with him. And I have never seen here like that! She gets along with everyone! Ok, I am done with my meanness for the month.
I think I might cancel my cable. I mean I like my TV don't get me wrong but do I really need it? Especially when I can rent the DVD and watch the whole season when the season ends?? I would really miss the Gilmore Girls and Grey's Anatomy but I just don't think I need it right now. I'm going to sleep on it and decided Friday. Oh, how I will miss the Gilmore Girls and my Simpsons. But I really like the older ones better anyway. Though I thought it was funny that they threw the Cubs reference in there. Am I the only one who thought it was funny that CNN said that Chicago couldn't wait for the White Sox to get back? Um, yeah have they ever been to Chicago. Yeah, yeah, I know there are White Sox fans out there but come on people! We are Cubs fans! Freaking media. Always getting things wrong. Don't believe half the crap they said about Wilma either. Pure Rubbish.
Should be studying
I still haven't figured out what the hell I am going to get him for his birthday. I think I might pick him up a new wallet. But I know it most likely will sit in his closet till he really needs it. I wouldn't' t by any means by him anything cheap.
My insurance is up for renewal. It went way down which is awesome!!! Woo-Hoo! A lot lower. I guess the first time was just more expensive because I wasn't insured in Florida? I have not a clue. I am just happy it went down. I guess it might also have something to do with the fact that I am now thirty. When did that happen I would like to know? I mean I thought I would be married and have at least one little one running around by now. And be done with school!! Arrggg. I guess G-D just had a different plan for me and I have to accept it right?
I was talking with my neurotic friend the other night and he actually told me that if I was in love that I would buy my own engagement ring. Uh, no. I am in love, duh, and there is no way I would buy my engagement ring. Hello, I am 30 and I know that if I haven't settled by now I'm not settling anytime soon! Apparently he doesn't know me as well as he thought. Then we got on the topic of living with someone. I have done it once and will never do it again. I think it was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made. (And I've made a lot) He was like well you and G. are basically living together. What!?! I see him on the weekends. So not the same. But he didn't understand because I will have to put up with the same stuff if I was married. I said well first of all there is a difference. It's called commintment. Knowing that I just can't get up and leave when it gets hard. I only want to do marriage once. Things are just so hard to explain to him some times.
I think my friend was upset that I went to the mosque. I really don't understand why he has such a problem with it. I mean how unchristian is it to hate another religion? I try to tell him this but I think he just tunes me out. I'm not about to say anyone's wrong. Where is it my place to judge you on your faith? Well, I might if you are a satanist because, well that's just odd. I mean worshipping evil? Where does that really get you? I actually knew one once. She burned down my Aunt's church with the help of her husband and some other people. Apparently she burned down a lot of churches. And she always seemed so sweet. You just never know about people.
I just realized how much I curse. I think I will be working on my language. See what happens when you grow up around the military? You really do curse like a sailor. I watched Pirates of the Caribbean on TV the other night. I had to laugh because Johnny Depp called some a scallywag(sp?). My mom is always saying that and I never knew what it meant. I guess my grandaddy said it all the time. ok, enough of my pointless banter.
Coming up for Air
I can once again breathe. I am sure it won't last long. But I will take it as long as it will last. I have so much to write and don't know where to start! I guess I will just write in small bits. I am taking a break from cleaning my house. I gave my dining room a really good cleaning. It is so hard to keep your house clean when you aren't home. Well, school started back Wed. it was hard but nice to get back in that routine again. I missed everyone! We were suppose to have a Pharm. exam but she postponed it. You have no idea how happy I was about that. I really wasn't has prepared as I should have been. But we are not going to have to make up any extra days, we just will have a test every week in both pharm. and theory. I am not sure how I feel about that yet. But I did get my mid term grades. I have an 85 in Pharmacology and a 89.33 in my Nursing! I feel such a relief. M. joked that I will be the one to ask the questions in our study group since I am getting the best grades. Hahaha. What I am worried about is my papers. ARRGGG. I hate writing papers. I usually get A's on them they are just so freaking time consuming.
I have spent the last two days being immersed in Indian culture. Eid was Thursday. We weren't really having a skills lab so I was able to go. I didn't think I was going to get to go because it might have been Wed. I was mad at baby because he forgot to tell me that they go in the morning and not in the evening. I was like why didn't you tell me this before I bought a freakin 80 dollar outfit? Well, his mom bought for me but that wasn't the point. But it all worked out in the end. It was my first time in a Mosque and I was nervous because I thought everyone would be looking at this white girl thinking what the hell is she doing here? Well, I got invited to prayer/fasting thing on Thursdays and a lot of people came up to me to wish me a Happy Eid. How freaking wild is that? His mom laughed because they come every week and never get invited. I guess they thought I was from the Middle East. I was just smiling cause I really didn't know what else to do! I really enjoyed myself though. We went back to his mom's house with the whole family and ate lots and lots of food and watched Indian movies.
I went to mosque again yesterday. I really enjoyed myself. I think his family was a bit surprised that I wanted to go. He told them that I was just interested and I am. I like finding out about new religions. I guess it's because I am just searching. My mom told me that no matter where I go that I am going to find spirituality because that is just how I am. I just found going was a real eye opener. I used to think of Islam as this religion that really oppressed women but I guess it only takes a couple of fundamentalist to turn something good into something ugly. We got into a really big conversation on it last night. I like seeing this side of him. When I first met him I had no ideal that he had a spiritual side. That was a turn off but I guess I was wrong. People just amaze me sometimes. That's what I love about him. He always surprises me. And it's not in a bad way.
I got to see the little bugger yesterday. I have missed him so much! I was afraid that he wouldn't remember me but he came and not only gave me one big hug when he saw me but two big hugs and a kiss. I think he has missed everyone. His sister looks happy. Which is a good thing. I met her mother and father in law and they both seem very nice.
Well, I still haven't written about California and I am going to start on that. It was a very fun trip but California wasn't what I expected. I am going to have to visit Southern Cali. to see what the fuss is about I guess.
