Thursday, June 30, 2005

Why isn't it the Fourth yet?

I was so freaking busy at work today. I swear I have never seen the dressing rooms in such a state of chaos. I had horrible flashbacks of Kohl's on a Saturday. Oh, the horror! Then someone called off so I had to work my own call shift. I will have worked 6 days in a row. I will have one fat paycheck. But of course it will go straight to the bookstore because apparently you have to auction off your first born to be able to afford the first year. I would hate to see what med school would be. Thank g-d I don't want to be a doctor.

I never realized how many boring people there actually are in the world. Really, there are so many freaking boring people. I mean they say they want to chat so u say cool then they just don't freaking really talk to you. WTF??? I mean it's online it should be easier right? Some people just need to get a sense of humor. You know? That's my argument for the legalization of marijuana. I'm sure it would turn out a whole lot of intersting people. That's why I don't do drugs because I don't need them! Ha. I'm such a bitch I know.

So I had such a fun time with C. on the phone last night taking these silly quizzes from my space.
My new phrase is spank me pink. How fun is that? I now know my porn name and stripper name. I am Topaz as a stripper and I forgot my porn name. But we did all our friends and some of them were fucking hilarious. But I took this love quiz and it said I was afraid of marriage. WTF??? C. totally agreed too. He's like, oh you are so afraid of commitment. I am not. I can't help it if I keep meeting weird people. I keep meeting these short ass guys. I mean short, like 5"6. Just never going to work. I like my men to be tall. I don't know why, it's just how it is. I mean if I wear heels and end up being taller that you, that's just so not right! Mmmmm.....that makes me sound a bit shallow but it's not just height. There is usually other weird personality things going on.

And what the hell is up with so many guys not liking sports. I can not believe that there are so many. I just have to say it is wrong!!!!!! I am I suppose to date someone who doesn't get basketball? I so am not. Well, off I go to the airport. I told G. I would keep company.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Freaking Tuesdays.

Man, I just inhaled a sub. I'm so serious. I don't think there was any chewing. I was so friggin hungry. I fucked up today. I wrote my schedule down wrong and thought I had to be in at 3. Um, no. I was suppose to be in at 10. Opps. I have never gotten ready so fast. At least I didn't lose any hours and she let me stay an extra hour. And my manager apologized for last Saturday's goof. I like my managers. They are really cool.
It was freaking busy today. I swear the dressing room was like empty for a minute and then everyone seemed to bring fifty items in with them. Then precede to buy one. WTF?

Some guy really irritated me last night. I chat with people when I'm bored online and I am always up front that it is just chatting. I am not on the prowl nor am I looking for a boyfriend. If I find someone I like cool, if not so be it. I get fucking bored and I like to talk. So I chat a couple of times with him and he was like all up my ass about not being online for awhile, so I must've lied about being single. WTF??? He was like "I was just trying to sweep you off your feet." Um, ya, that's so not going to happen. Why don't people just freaking listen? First thing all that sweet talk just does not work on me. Second, if the spark isn't there, it's not ever going to happen with me. Sorry.

D. was like what would make you fall. Well, that is so simple yet so hard at the same time isn't? Because if it was easy, I guess I wouldn't be single. I just want someone who gets me. Which is a really hard one because I am a strange little individual. I want someone that I can truly talk to because that is huge with me. I want someone who I can finally let my guard down with. That I could actually trust not to shit on me. I also would like someone who can take care of themselves. Hello, I am not your momma. Someone who likes to live. I want someone who I can share life with, not watch TV with. Been there done that. And he can't lie about being 5'9. hehehe. A. understands that one,hehehe.

Sis, I can not believe how big your belly is!!!!!!!! Are you sure there just one baby in there? Ok, I am still so amazed that my little brother and sister our parents already. It just seems like yesterday that you guys were babies!

I got the funniest fortune today. I picked up a pack of matches at the newsstand and they must have been freaking bored because they put fortunes on them. " The next guy you finger as being gay will actually straighten you out about it." mmmm......I dunno, the last person I said was gay was Tom Cruise. I really don't think I'll be hearing from him.

Sunday, June 26, 2005

I can't sleep. This really blows. I turned my off my phone and now I regret doing it because I missed little bro's call. I would call back but I don't know where he's at. Blah. I turned my phone off because it just takes one annoying individual to annoy the fuck out of you. I swear D. just flip flops. He can be cool one minute and then just drive me fucking crazy. I don't know why he has to ask so many freaking questions. You know?
C. totally understood why I couldn't come up. He has offered to buy my plane ticket but I think it's just best to keep my happy ass down here. I really should go somewhere. I haven't been on vacay in so long. Not since NYE.

Man I would hurt someone for a candy bar right now. mmm......a carmello sound so friggin good right now. This is when I wished I had a roommate. One that was a night owl. I am so bored. I think I say that way to much. My mom asked if I was happy tonight. I told her the I was very happy and that I thought my life was perfect. Which I think it is. Don't get me wrong I have my moments. It's weird because my neighbor told me that I was one lucky girl. I just think you have to make life what you want it. Don't get me wrong, I would love to change somethings. I would love to be a 5'8 tall knockout but let's face it. It's never gonna happen.

Man, this cheese just doesn't cut it when one is craving chocolate. Damn, why don't I keep candy in the house. There was a shark attack and a little girl got killed. And people think I'm crazy because I worry about sharks. Yeah, you don't see me in a shark's tummy do ya?

Ok, what was weird was G. apologizing for last week. He said he was sorry if it seemed like he was blowing me off. Whoa, I have no idea what the hell is going on with that boy. Really, one minute I think I have him totally figured out and then I am just blown away by something. Fuck.

You know what name is fun to say? Bananarama. Isn't that just a fun word? Sorry I am listening to some like 80's music, I'm so sure!I am so glad that I was just a kid in the 80's. But they did have some fab music and movies.

I can't believe that my vacation is almost over. I had all this stuff I had planned that I wanted to do and I haven't done crap. Nothing. *Sigh* But I am having some fun so that's good. I want to go out next weekend. I NEED to go dancing. I hope I don't have to work. Fuck it I'll just go in hung over. It's not like I haven't done it before. Ok, I guess I should go and really try to get some sleep.

Life is good!

I am starting to freak out. I know this is normal but know I have just realized what I have gotten myself into. I have wanted this for so long that I didn't have time to freak out about it. Crap, I hope I can do this. I am so freaking scared. I am also amazed at how much money it takes to freaking start. I guess I will be going nowhere this summer. C. will be so disappointed but this comes before everything else, right? Yet, I am so excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can't help but smile everytime that I think about it. Heeheeee. Man, I was right when I said that 2005 would rock. It so has!!!!!! Mmm. and just think the silly palm reader said I was going have an even better year next year. How is that possible?:)

What is really cool is that one of the girls from my Micro. class will be in the program with me. Which is way cool because she's smart and a great study partner. Hopefully we can get the same classes and hospital rotations. It will help to have a friendly face! She called the other today to make sure I got in and gave me some info on the stuff that needs to be done. There is so much to be done. I am going to be on my computer at midnight the first day of registration dammit. I can't wait!

I had so much fun with my neighbors at the park yesterday. F-U-N! My arms are freaking killing me though. I haven't hit any balls since I was 15. I was told that I have great hand/eye coordination. That's always a plus. hehe. Then my neighbors were really cool and had me over for some dinner. I never turn down free food. It is so bad.

Then this guy that I have been talking to came over and hung out. We had some beer and pizza and watched Scarface. Man, I thought that movie was never going to end. Don't get me wrong it was a good movie. He seems nice but one never knows. G-d knows I'm not the best judge of character. I once thought I was, but in reality I realize that I am not. That's why I just let things flow anymore. I just don't have the energy, I guess. But he is cool so far, but you just never know. Besides it's not like I am looking for anything. It's strange how not looking for someone makes your life so much easier. Don't get me wrong, I get lonely and all that and I think it would be great to find someone that I would actually want to be with. I just want what I want and I am not going to settle anymore.

I am so excited because I am going to go see Coldplay. Woo-Hoo!!! I haven't been to a concert in so freaking long. I am so embarrassed to actually say. But to be fair I did live with a fucking hermit for five years. Really what the hell was wrong with me. How did I live with someone that long and not realize that we were never going to be? Why does love blind us so. I am so scared of that happening again. Hopefully, I've gotten smarter about the whole deal. I wish they had a pill for that kind of crap. Wouln't that be great? Just take this pill and the rose colored glasses vanish! That would so rock. Yeah, that's my new word for awhile. ha.

Saturday, June 25, 2005

A bitching sort of blog

I am so unbelievably freaking bored right now. I don't know how I could possibly be any border. I have had the most crappy ass two days. Blah. I finally have my car parked in front of my apartment. I hate not having transportation. It is such a major bitch relying on people. I hate it and besides one can never rely on anyone but themselves. Right? Right. Once I found out differently, I'll let you know. And family doesn't count.

So, Friday at work totally sucked ass. I had to freaking get a ride from G. He had gotten in around one and the had to go pick up his cousins. I ended up being an hour and a half late to work. Which if anyone knows me, you know what being late does to me. I was only on the sales floor for about an hour so I didn't to much in sales. I think I was lucky if I hit a hundred. But I didn't mind that much.

So G. ends up picking me up but I didn't know he was bringing his cousins. So we ended up walking around the mall for like two friggin hours. Oh, joy. Then he takes me home and says he will be back to get my car. Well, he didn't show up until 1 o'clock and then he took them on a small tour of fucking Ft. Lauderdale before hitting the Hard Rock. Ugh. Then we finally get there and I was just going to leave but no he wants me to hang out. So I do and we just walk around a bit because neither of his cousins drink. Well, we finally get ready to leave and we can't find his other cousin who is at the slots. We find him, G. goes to cash in his tickets for him and the dude fucking walks off again. It was like being with a freakin two year old. I was so fucking pissed! So I didn't get home until 5 and I had to be up a 6:30. I was miserable at my meeting.

I just woke up from a fabulous nap. I hope I can find something fun to do tonight. I am going to go to the park with my neighbors for a bit. That should be fun. Haven't done that in soooooooo long. I talk to my brother and he cheered me up. He can be such a riot. I really hope he gets to come down here. We will have so much fun. I love my family.:)

I was so full of energy before my nap and was so beautiful out and of course I couldn't find anyone to hang with and nothing to do. The minute I fall asleep, everyone wants to call. What the hell people. What the hell!!!!!!!! Well, I hope I have a good night. I need to redeem today and the last two days. I was on such a roll there.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

I feel like the walking dead

Well, it has been a very interesting two days to say the least. I finally fucking received my package today. And yes I did get in!!!!!!!!! How fucking great is that? I actually danced around my living room when I read "you have been accepted." Yes, I know what a dork I am. The postman put a note on the envelope for me and pointed out that it took nine friggin days to get here. WTF?????????????? I am excited because it isn't like the other nursing program and it's only four days a week and I will have more time to study that I original thought. Life is freaking good.

But I called yesterday to ask if they were sending rejection letters and the lady said that I should've received something by now. She was nice and looked me up and and said "Well, honey you got in." I almost cried and had to ask like three times that she was correct. I told her that I had been a nervous wreck for the last two weeks. I still can't believe that I'm finally ready to start! I have so much to do before school. I am going to have to stay off the computer and get off my lazy bum and get motivated. I wish the rain would stop. It's like my freaking kryptonite. Damn rain.

I went and had coffee yesterday. It was good. He was really fun to hang out with. Not anything romantic but he had friend potential. I'm sure he wouldn't like that but all well. Then I ended up talking with someone on the phone and decided to meet them for some drinks. Not the smartest thing probably but it turned out to be lots of fun. I'm glad I went. He was a really cool guy. A total blast to hang out with. But to be honest he was really the funniest person who I have talked to online. Apparently I look nothing like my pics. Weird. I never knew my pics were that bad that I look like a would different person. LOL But I was so tired today. I so didn't want to go into work. It was so busy but at least I got to greet for two hours. That helped, because I was still not awake. Usually I hate greeting because it is so freaking boring but I welcomed it today.

It totally sucks because my car is still there and I have to figure out how the hell I am going to go get it. Especially since I have to work tomorrow. Crap. I should have been responsible and just stuck with the one beer that I was going to have. I don't think I'll ever learn.

Well, my little nephew is on his way. I am so freaking excited. I guess she went into the hospital yesterday but they sent her home. I just got off the phone with mom and I guess that she is still in labor. Poor thing. I still can't believe that I'm an auntie. I am going to have to figure out when I can go see them.

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Random thoughts about nothing much.

Well, I feel like the biggest bitch for getting upset over nothing yesterday. He just called and his dad just died. He left today and was lucky enough to see him before he passed. I feel so bad for him. Actually can't believe I feel this bad for him. There was a time when I would not have cared but I don't want to see him hurt. What the hell is up with that. I guess he finally has crossed over to that zone where I actually seem to care for him as a true friend. I'm just glad that he went because he wasn't and he would have regretted it.

Today was alright at work. I didn't feel myself today. It was weird. I just felt off for some reason. I am truly scared now because I still have gotten any letters. I am now in that depression zone where I so do not want to be. I don't get to this place very often but I hate being there. I don't want to do anything crazy or self destructive because I'm upset. I dunno I just need to get away by myself. Maybe I will hit the beach or something tomorrow. I need to catch up on my reading anyway. I am meeting someone for coffee tomorrow and I don't know if I should or not.

I miss everyone right now, which doesn't help. I want to go to home and see my friends. I want to see my family. Ugh, why can't I have a car that I could just take off in.

I had the weirdest dream about my friend's brother being a pirate. He was living in my building and had catnapped my mom's kitty. And he wouldn't give her back. Which is strange because he's a total sweetheart. At least he was. I dunno he might have changed, haven't seen him in awhile. Maybe he is a catnapper.:)
I wonder what in the hell my subconscious is trying to tell me there.
I once thought a buckeye was a pirate. Why I do not know. Apparently it is a nut of some sort. Now really why would I know that? I hate fucking Ohio. Truly one of the worst places I have ever been. The place was boring, boring, boring. I tried to give it a try. I really truly did. Everyone who is from there loves it. Me, I just never got the place.

Ok, I am going to go try to cheer myself up. I don't know how but I am going to try. Maybe I'll just take a couple of sleeping pills and call it a night. After all, tomorrow's another day......

Monday, June 20, 2005

Drinking and blogging, Just don't do it.

I think I expect to much from people sometimes and I wonder why I get hurt. I am so annoyed with people right now. One minute you think you are cool with someone, that you are both on the same level and then things go weird. I mean just because we are sleeping together doesn't mean I want something. Ugh. Boys are so fucking weird. But see he thinks he is such a stud how could I possibly resist his charms right? I mean if I say I don't ever want to date you, I fucking mean it. I've been down that road before and have no desire to go down it again. I think he just likes the power trip. WTF ever. Why do boys have to be such fucking trouble? Really?

I don't know maybe I was just over reacting. I just don't want to be treated like I was before because I will not forgive him again. I will not be blown off again because he gets a girlfriend and then we he gets his heartbroken he comes running back to me. I know I shouldn't be so hard on him because he is going through a lot. Half of me wants to know that things are ok but the other half remembers how fucked up he treated me. Blah, I think I've had to much wine. He just pissed me off tonight and it's weird because it wasn't anything he said. It was how he said it.

I fucked up and emailed the wrong person some photos. I'm a little be weirded out right now. Crap. Hopefully I don't get an angry e-mail from some irate girlfriend wondering why the hell I'm sending her man photos. Crap, crap, crap.

I still didn't get my letter. I know they've gone out because another girl got hers and I had more points than she did and she got in. I am on pins and needles here. Fuck, I just want my letter. But I am in a different county than she is so maybe that's why I haven't gotten it.
Wow, I say fuck a lot when I've been drinking.

That's the bad thing about wine. I just can't have one glass. I feel bad about leaving all that wine and fearing it will go to waste. Yeah, it's an excuse but one I'm using.

I think it's time to get back on the dating scene but I so don't want a repeat of what happened last time. I hate settling down so fucking fast. People want to have a couple a dates then the next thing you know the guy wants to be a couple. Maybe the men I date are to needy? Of course I only give my heart out to real assholes so I have my own issues.

Ok, this is going to sound so bad but I wish that I would have slept with the cute New York boy. G-d, I just need one really good, hot one night stand. Ugh, but in reality he probably isn't any good in bed. But then again, he was a Scorpio.... They are just evil. Really, they are. But damn they are great in bed. Truly, if you haven't tried a Scorpio, you should. That's my public service announcement for the week. Go sleep with a Scorpio, you won't be disappointed.:)

Saturday, June 18, 2005

Still no clue

Well, it still hasn't gotten here. I think they are trying to drive us insane on purpose. My postman was so freaking cool today. I had an express package, so he was kind enough to bring me the rest of my mail and let me know that it still hadn't came.

I went out and spent way to much money today. I went to Costco and what a fucking mad house that was. I have no clue to why people have to stand there and take up the whole aisle. MOVE IT PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I will run you over because I am that mean crazy bitch.

Then I went to the mall to pick up my work clothes and that place was a zoo too. I should know better than to venture out on the weekend. Bath and Body works was having a kick ass sale and I did stock up on some lotion and soap. I felt like stocking up today for some reason:) Then I hit target and Publix. This guy at Publix was ticking me off. He kept looking at my cart, I was feeling very self conscious about that for some reason.

I realize how boring this must be for people who might actually read this. All well.
My neighbor came over with some Tiramasu Thurs. night which was way cool. We hung out a bit. It's always a good time because we talk about music and get all philosophical about religion.

Work was so boring last night. I have never been there when it was so freaking slow! I did get the whole front of the store done before we closed, that is how slow we were.

I went and got some children's benadryl today. I hope it calms Caesar down a bit. He is so freaking scared of thunderstorms. He actually had a panic attack Thurs. night. I felt so bad for him. Poor baby. But I have to get a dropper. I have no idea where to get those. They didn't have any at Target, so I guess I'll try Walgreens.

Well, I am going to go get productive and finish cleaning my house and start my laundry since I didn't get it done Thurs. Ciao.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Still no letter!

I have the postman on the look out now. Our mailman is really nice. I want my letter! But mom said that I probably wouldn't get it until Sat. Blah.

I went into work today to try on some clothes and put some stuff on hold. I guess they were really busy today. Figures the day they call me off they would have a busy day. But at least we won't go under in our sales.
I went into Nordstrom today to try on some jeans. I found two pairs I like and have to decide which ones I want. They were really cool and but them on hold for me. I have to think about it because they are Sevens and I want to be sure with anything I spend money on. One pair felt like heaven and made my bum look so good. I will pay a $132 for that. I don't feel bad about spending money on jeans because I take really good care of my clothes and I live in jeans. But I do buy cheap stuff too. I have a pair of $20 Jordache jeans on from Wal-Mart right now. I must say for being Wal-mart jeans the fit is great. They work great with heels, so no hemming and they fit is amazing. Props to Jordache. I heard that Wal-Mart is going to be having higher end merchandise to attract a different demographic. WTF ever. Yeah, that's going to go well. Morons. Personally I stay out of Wal-Mart. I think they are just evil but that's just my two cents. I prefer Target.
I love Nordstrom, they have the best customer service. Me and mom buy our makeup there and she just got a note from the Prescriptives counter thanking her for her purchase and if she wanted to come in for a makeover just come in at anytime. I think that is just cool. I love that personal touch they have.

I guess I will clean my house tonight and start on my laundry and catch up on some paperwork. I really need to start going reviewing some anp stuff tonight. I might also start reviewing dosage stuff. There were a couple of problems on the procalc that I had trouble with. I had no clue to what the hell they were talking about. I am so glad that mom kept her books! I also need to email and write to some people. I miss everyone!!!!!

Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Potential Stalker

Ok, if I do not get a letter soon I will be stalking the poor ladies at the nursing program. I am going to go insane!!!!! I want my letter. Blahaaaaaa. I know I have the patience of a two year old.
My sis goes to the doctor today. They will schedule her for her ultra sound so she can finally find out with the little bundle is. I can't wait. I think she is being very patient about the whole thing. I think I would been driving myself crazy wondering what the sex was. Like I said I have no patience. Of course it's a girl:) If it is a boy I don't think he will find it amusing that I called him Little Miss Diva in the womb. Unless he grows up to me a Diva.

Well, I got a call from work today. The are cutting everyone's hours this week because I guess they are super slow. Which is a bummer, because I really wanted to work tomorrow. But at least they didn't call me off Friday. I wish I could have switched days. I have so much to do Friday. Maybe I will wait and do my errands Sat. I can be fine as long as I hit Costco before they open. The wonderful perk of being an executive member.:) I hate going to Costco any other time. The one by me is a freaking war zone. There are never enough carts and people are stressed and rude. I can't begin to tell you how many domestic disputes between old married couples I've seen. It's all quite humorous.

G. came back yesterday. He came over to hang out last night. He actually brought me something back. I was quite impressed. I am such a brat. The whole time he was packing, I kept reminding him to bring me something back. I was sure he was going to bring me back a napkin or something. hehehe. I still haven't figured out why he is being so super nice to me lately. I mean he has always taken care of me but he is being way nice. kinda weird.

Since I am bored I figure I will list fifteen more things about Pixie. Oh, I know so many people really care. Ha!

1. I have never been stung by a bee and plan on keeping it that way. I will make a total fool of myself around bees.

2. I have to watch It's a Wonderful Life, A Miracle on 34th St. and How the Grinch Stole Christmas every year. It's just not the holidays without them.

3. I am terrified of Clowns. There is no reason just don't trust the bastards. I have been this way since I was four and had to see Ronald McDonald.

4. I went to my first concert at 15 with my mom and cousins. It was Metallica and Guns and Roses.

5. I love 80's movies. Especially 16 Candles.

6. I am a weirdo who prefers driving a manual over an automatic.

7. I want a bunny super, super bad. But I can't have one because my kitties would most likely terrorize the poor thing.

8. Basketball is my favorite sport, both pro and college. I live for March Madness

9. I really just don't get football.

10. I have a slight addiction to fashion magazines.

11. Sometimes I will just browse through my Taber's just for fun when I'm bored. I know I'm a dork. I guess it's better than reading a real dictionary. Maybe if I did that I would be a better speller. :)

12. I have broken my pinky toe three times. I am a super klutz.

13. I still miss my dog that I had when I was little.

14. Even if I won the lottery I would still drive a Honda.

15. I have only watched the Exorcist once and will never watch it again. It scared me way too much. Werewolf movies also scare the hell out of me.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Another boring day in the life.....

The sun is out for two days straight and I am in Heaven. Of course it is hotter than hell but I can live with that. I'm bummed because I wasn't called into work. What the hell am I suppose to do with myself now? I guess I can catch up with my magazines. I am so freaking bored right now. I would go out and do something but I am broke and don't feel like wasting my gas. I hate being broke. I will be for awhile because I am going to buy some work clothes Friday. I guess I really don't need them but I hate wearing black. I also hate wearing the same thing over and over.

I can not believe that Michael Jackson got off. I mean I guess there really wasn't enough evidence but I still think he did it. Freak. What really irritates the hell out of me is the jurors. They hated the mom and I think that is one of the big reasons they let him walk. Fucking idiots. I know, I am oh so nice. It's a wonder I have friends. But what is the deal with this guy. I mean if people still let their kids hang out with him they are just crazy.

I know people talk about the American justice system being messed up and blah, blah, blah. And I would have to agree that it has it's flaws. What doesn't right? But after watching the Aruba stuff it makes me glad that I live here man.

I still haven't received my letter. I am getting so freaking nervous. I am hoping that tomorrow is the day. G-d, please let tomorrow be the day. I hate this waiting.

I talked to my brother today and they are sending him out to do this freaking dangerous ass job. I wish he would have never told me about it because now I will be having some pretty fucked up dreams about him. I can't wait until July, I think I might be able to make it out there for the weekend. I can not wait to meet my nephews. I am so excited!! Oh, by the way Sis, he is wondering why you haven't called him. He was wodering how you were doing.

I have to find a recipe for tuna steaks. I bought some at Costco and have no clue what to do with them. I guess I will just grill one and see how it turns out. I looked last night for some but they were all for canned tuna. Why are there so many recipes for canned tuna? How many casserole recipes does one really need.

Monday, June 13, 2005

A little ranting tonight.

Ok, I am a little pissed. I finally talked to D. but not for very long because I am still irritated with him. He asked me if I had gotten into the program. I said that I haven't received my letter yet. He was like oh, then he texted me an hour and said that I should stay in retail and save my money and invest. As if I wasn't getting in or something. Well, they haven't sent the letters out yet because I haven't gotten any calls from people in my classes yet. WTF??? This is coming from a guy who has been in school for ten years with no degree.

He is always acting like I don't know anything. This is a person who copied off me in our Advanced Physio. Lab. Sorry, for my little rant. He just irritates me sometimes. He knows this and yet he still does it.

I am so freaking tired of people who just live in their own little sheltered lives and only experience things through movies. Stop asking me questions, get up off your lazy ass and get out a little more. There is a whole freaking world out there. Get a freaking real hobby besides tv.

I am also pissed off because people keep telling me that I play it too safe. The fuck I do not. I take risk in my life. Just because I don't feel like racing down the expressway at 150 or jumping out of a plane doesn't mean I am a safe non-risk taker. I am a bitch without health insurance and I don't feel like breaking anything. Can you tell people have been annoying me lately?

Thursday, June 09, 2005

Boring blog day

I am so freaking tired of rain. I want the rain to stop already! I am such a big baby now. I can not tolerate any weather below 65 degrees and more than two days without sun kills me.

I am now scared of the mailbox. I want my letter to get here but I will be so freaking scared to open it. I have butterflies just thinking about it. Blah. When did nursing school become so fucking competitive.

Caesar was laying in front of the patio today watching the rain. I wanted to know what his little kitty brain was contemplating so bad. He just looked so deep in thought. I know he is just a cat but he really looked like he was thinking pretty hard. Probably wondering how he ended up with such a crazy ass owner.

I locked my other cat in the closet by accident today. He was in there for a really long time. I felt so bad. I really should rethink having the whole kid thing.

I am fairly annoyed today because I hate it when you don't feel like answering the phone and someone just automatically assumes you are ignoring them. Ok, your not that damn special. I just don't feel like freaking talking. And by the way, calling a million times in a row isn't going to make me pick up either.

I had a couple of bizarre dreams last night. One involved my grandmother and this guy I was married to. It's weird because I'm not married and haven't been but in the dream I was. I could never see his face. I could only tell that he had dark hair. Well, we were on some beach up on the east coast vacationing and eating crab legs. Bizarre. It was a nice dream cause Nana was in it.

The other one was just annoying. I hate those dreams about people you don't want to dream about. Then the in the other one, I was on the turnpike and when I went through the SunPass lane the gate made my car die somehow. Of course it was rush hour and people were yelling at me and then this van comes out of nowhere and hits me. I woke up pissed!

I need to go do something fun. I need to act like a tourist and go somewhere that I have never been. I miss the art institute. I need to go check out some museums around here.

I have to say I am a little pissed off about the Mark Hacking sentence. I'm not sure if I spelled his name right. WTF? You kill your pregnant wife and you get 6 years to life? WTF!!!!! I hope he gets at least freaking 30 or more. If they let him out in 6 years my faith in the justice system will be so crushed. I just can't believe that you would lie to someone you supposedly loved then turn around and just dispose of them like trash. Especially when they are carrying your first fucking child. I'll never understand how people can be so mean to those they are suppose to love. Bastard. I still can't believe that women in Texas only got 25 years for stabbing her husband like hundred times. People are insane. Divorce people, Divorce!!!!!!!! And people wonder why I'm still single. Hmmm.......I wonder.

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

30 Things about me

I am bored.

1. I am list maker. It gets really out of hand sometimes. I really love my palm pilot waayy to much.

2. My favorite TV show is The Simpsons and I love Homer.

3. I have the memory of an elephant. Yes, I said elephant. They have excellent memories. I remember freaking everything. Though sometimes, I will act like I don't. I'm a very weird girl.

4. I love Frank Sinatra

5. I played the clarinet in school.

6. I have always wanted to live in Paris, France

7. I wanted to be Supreme Court Justice when I was a little girl. Or a ballerina.

8. My addiction and drug of choice is Diet Coke. I drink way to many.

9. I love shoes . All shoes. Cheap shoes, expensive shoes, designer shoes. I love 'em all.

10. I want to adopt.

11. I want a bulldog named Sinatra. or Frank.

12. I also want a little yorkie who I will name Princess Coco Chanel.

13. I love being the oldest.

14. When ever I see a group of numbers I automatically have to add them together.

15. My favorite book is The Diary of Anne Frank

16. I always have to write business stuff in black ink. Thanks for that one Mr. Carmichael. Damn business English class. I hate blue pens.

17. I did no homework in high school. I don't know how I graduated.

18. I could eat buffalo wings everyday. Not the healthiest thing but damn they are good.

19. One person who I really admire is Mother Teresa

20. My favorite song in Crazy by Patsy Cline

21. I think frogs are cute

22. I people watch and don't care if people catch me.

23. I love holidays. My favorite time of the year is Halloween thru New Year's

24. I love Panda Bears

25. I have never shoplifted.

26. My favorite color is pink.

27. I'd rather wear a dress or skirt in the summer than shorts

28. I read the comics and my horoscope everyday. The comics I believe

29. I am a news junkie.

30. I am not romantic. When guys bring me flowers or write me poetry I just want to laugh.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

It feels like Wed.

Ok, somewhere down the road I lost a day. It does not feel like Tues. I also realize that I say Ok way to much. I probably say fuck to much to but I am OK with that. Hey, I have my priorities.

Well, today was my first day of work. Wasn't to bad. But as we all know they that's how they get ya. "We'll give her some easy days shifts then we'll give her the days from hell." I know how it works. But I do love my managers. They are so cute, short and full of life. The ones you don't want to make mad my friends. See, people always think the cute little ones are safe and non threating. Yeah, you won't say that after you get your ass kicked by one. Hehehehe. I can only say this because I am one of those small cute perky girls. But man piss me off and I'll cut your ass! Just kidding. Maybe.

I was driving down the expressway today and there was a freaking mattress right off the ramp. How great is that. Like 95 doesn't have enough problems. Hey asshole secure your fucking shit. I almost saw a guy hit a police car. For some reason I thought this was funny. It wouldn't have been a bad accident. Just a fender bender, but man how bad would that suck?

I am driving home from work today in rush hour traffic and I realize that I am surrounded by nothing but Jags, Mercedes, BMW's and other assortment of high end cars. My car felt very out of place. Of course I had my music blaring, jamming all crazy like. Next time someone looks at me I am going to go all ghetto ass on them. My car is also feeling bad because she is running into sister cars and they aren't showing there age as bad. But I try to console her by saying she is a tough bitch who has survived many winters and one blizzard. But this doesn't make her feel any better. Poor thing.

load up the bong, crank up the song, let the informer call 911
and when security police force arrive, Don't try to run, don't
try to hide, just pull out the nine, pump in the clip and let one slip
into these crazy fools. A little sublime brought to you by pixie. I don't know why but I really like that song. Craziness. I think I just like to say bong and pump in the clip. I think a bong would kill me. No, I am pretty sure that a bong would kill me.

My friend is going out of the country and he's like "I'll get drug tested when I get back." WTF? So, going out of the country means that you'll do drugs? And what if you go to Amsterdam where it is legal. Then I would think you have a whole right to smoke as much pot as you well damn well please. It may be in your system but come on. The man is always trying to bring you down. Hehehehe. Besides, I am thinking how many people are trying to sell drugs to Americans when they actually leave the country?

I have been thinking of getting a tattoo and I really shouldn't. I hate the one that I got. But I want a butterfly! I know how original am I? But I really do like butterflies. This one would be where no one could see. I dunno know. Maybe for my birthday? Older but none the wiser am I.
And off to bed I go.

Monday, June 06, 2005

Ok, I think I might have a problem

Ok, I think I am addicted to blogging. This is so sad. I am reading so many freaking blogs now. Ok, but here is the very sad part. If I find an interesting blog and I have to read it from the beginning. WTF is wrong with me!!!!!!!!!!!! Oy! Good thing I have no life. I blame all of this on my sis. She is the one who started it! heeheehee. Just kidding S.! Love ya, really!:) And I would also like to add that I love your blog.

So, I had to spend quite some time catching a freaking lizard that was in my spare bedroom. I would gladly let it roam free if I could. But within seconds the bug catcher, aka, Caesar would be all over that shit. I would then feel horrible. I let him catch bugs all the time but things like that I just can't.

Ok, just have to give props to Fat Boy, aka Caesar. (I have way to many nicknames for my cats. I so need a life) This cat is the fastest, most graceful cat I have ever seen. I mean it. I am not bragging either. And is is like freaking huge! I am talking 18 pds. of cat. But we all know he really isn't 18 pounds. He just hasn't shed his winter fur yet! My other cat doesn't have an ounce of grace. Cats always land on their feet my ass. But see Shakes doesn't have the best skill but he is the one with the brains. Great duo they make. Kinda like Pinky and the Brain. Or was in Binky? Whatever. The two mice, the dumb one and the one who wanted to take over the world.

Ok, a little pissed of at my neighbor. Dude, where the hell is my bottle of replacement wine? Ok, I know he isn't going to read this. I know this because he doesn't know about it. I was making dinner and I wanted a class of wine so bad. I like to drink a glass when cooking so if the food does come out bad I won't give a damn. I guess I am going to have to break down and go stock up again. I just finished the last of my PA wine. Man they had some good stuff in Pennsylvania.

Oh, and A. if you read this I hope your first day of training went well! I still can't believe your done! Ok, now I am insanely jealous of you now. :) Hehehehe. Kick ass on that NCLEX girl!

I got a letter saying that they received my application and how many points I had. Come on acceptance letter!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, I thought I heard on the radio that Coldplay was touring. Thought it was my over active imagination but lo and behold they are. In the famous words of Homer Simpson, Woo-Hoo!!!!!!!!!!! I am going to see Coldplay! Please universe? I think it is in my best interest for me to see Coldplay:) They are coming in Sept. so early birthday present for me!!

Happy! Happy! Joy! Joy!

"The trick to being happy is learning to want the right things. The funny thing about the universe is that once you learn what the right things for you are, very often you start to receive them (especially if you remember to say please and thank you -- the stars are suckers for good manners). So why not take a moment or two everyday and do some soul-searching about your real desires? You can get 'em if you really want." provided by

Gotta love a horoscope like that. Heheh. So I am going to be an asking fool today. hehehe.

Today is such a weird day. I have a feeling I will be popping on here to write more than a few times. I have no need to go out to day. Though the sun in trying to trick me into believing he will be staying all day. But you see, I know better. As soon as I get half way to where I want to go, he will laugh and then the skies will open and the rain will start all over again. No thank you.

I will venture out tomorrow. Tomorrow is my errand day and also my first day of work. Hope all goes well and I don't piss to many people off.

I am sitting here listening to the Dead and man am I really missing Jerry right now. I haven't played any of their stuff in so long. I have forgotten what a mood lifter it can be.

Well, my friend G. was such a great guy and washed my car. He did the works while and sat on my lazy bum and talked on my cell phone. Let me tell you my car is gleaming right now. My car is so happy! I am such a bad car owner. I rarely wash her yet she never complains. She's such a good car. :)

I had a good dream last night, it was a little weird but man was it good. I rarely have those good dreams. I always have a really strange dream or ones that would scare the hell out of Stephen King. So it was nice to have a great dream. But it was about a boy and I can't believe that I was having such a girly dream. Blah!!!!!!!!! I mean I haven't thought about this boy in a really long time. Why is he still in my subconscious dammit!!!!

I got to talk to my sis today which just upped my mood. See ask and thou shall receive. I was just thinking about her and she calls!! I can't wait to find the results of her ultra sound. I am so excited! I still think she's going to have a little girl. I have nicknamed the baby little miss diva. Proabably not good if it turns out to be boy. I can't wait to get my first paycheck so I can go buy some Winnie the Pooh stuff. I am so glad she did the nursery in Pooh Bear! I love pooh and Tigger. T-i-double-grr! Ok, I am a freak.

Ok, it is raining again!!!! Grrrrr.......

Maybe I will catch up on my scrapbook. I have so many photos that I need to put in. Seriously I have like two years worth. At one point I was somewhat caught up and now I am once again behind. Maybe if I stopped being so damn camera happy I wouldn't have so many. I have a serious problem with cameras. Give me one and it is just trouble. I finally got a digital camera and I have already gone through one set of batteries. So sad. I am a picture taking fool. hehehe

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Home Sweet Home

I can't believe I am about to say this but I am homesick. I have no idea what has brought this on but I miss Indy today. I have no desire to move back. There is truly nothing left there for me. I have hardly any family there. I mean I do have friends but is that a reason to move somewhere that you never belonged? I always felt the urge to escape.

I miss getting a burger and tater tots at the Mug and Bun. I miss knowing where everything is. I knew the place like the back of my hand. The short cuts, what places to avoid at certain hours.
I miss sitting outside at Wings and Things. I miss the strong drinks at the Alley Kat. I really miss Marsh. I miss running into people at the store or driving down the road. I miss the radio stations. I miss the three hour drive my mom's old place in Chicago.

I really miss Chicago. *Sigh* The clubs, Deerfield's Bakery, Woodfield, Wrigley Field.

I miss my house and my June bug and his parents.

It has been two years and 6 months since I have left and sometimes it feels like yesterday. Funny but I really don't miss the boy. That actually kinda hurts to say considering I was with him for five years. I wonder if he ever misses me? Do I truly want to know?

I blame all this on the rain. Damn raining season in Florida. And I thought about moving to Seattle at one point.
I. Am. Insane.

The color of the sky is grey as I can see through the blinds. Lift my head from the pillow and then fall again with a shiver in my bones just thinking about the weather. A quiver in my voice as I cry, "What a cold and a rainy day. Where on Earth is the sun hid away?" I shiver, quiver, and try to wake. -1o,ooo Maniacs.

I love music, it seems there is always a song to fit any mood.

Saturday, June 04, 2005

Just pointless thoughts.......

I sit and wonder what the hell is wrong with me sometimes. I mean I feel like an alien at times. I wonder what the hell is wrong with people and why they just don't get it. I hate to say but I think I might be a stuck up bitch. Seriously. I mean I don't know where I get off being so self righteous sometimes. I think half of the population are complete idiots. And that's being nice.

I think that I right most of the time. I will argue at point until the very end if I know I am right. But hey, I can admit when I am wrong. I am extremely bossy. Just ask my mom and anyone who knows me well. My mom says I have been that way since I was a toddler. WTF? I'm also sure my family didn't help much. Everyone was always going on about me. Wonder where I got the "I'm perfect" attitude. My family. Their fault that I have way to much confidence. Ha!

I just would love to know what people truly thing about me. I mean I tell people what I think all the time. Really, I never shut up. I am way to open about certain things. My mom's ex-husband stated that I was way to opinionated. Well, duh. But I think I am open minded. It takes me awhile to think about how I feel. I weigh each side equally then I come up with my opinion. I rarely just form an opinion right away. I do change my opinion sometimes. Very rarely, but hey it happens.

Something that has really bothered me lately is my political party. I really feel that this is a touchy subject for 99% of people. Just like religion. You just don't talk about it. Well, I have always fancied myself as a Democrat. Actually, I am the only one in my family. Hey, all my family members live in red states. I'm ok with that. I know that some of them wonder where they went wrong with me. Hehehe. But I digress. I have had several people of late tell me they think that I am not a Democrat. That I am really a Republican! WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I consider myself very open minded. I feel that you should be able to express yourself without harassment as long as your not hurting others. I feel that your religion is your own. You believe in it, you own it. I feel that one has no right to throw their beliefs on you. I do believe in G-D and I have my beliefs. But I will not try to change anybody else's. I may try to encourage someone to be more accepting that is all. But this is where I feel that both parties are wrong and why I don't feel I belong in the Red category. I mean since when did homosexuality and abortion become the biggest agenda for voting? Shouldn't we put those thins aside and maybe focus on say the kids that are here now? What about the elderly that get over looked everyday? What about healthcare? Education?

I just have some things to weigh I guess. I just know I will not vote for Hillary if she runs for president. I consider myself a feminist but I think she is just a tad bit evil. I really never cared for her husband all that much either. Sigh.... we really need some better candidates. I mean Kerry seemed intelligent but boring.

Ok, I am done with that. Sorry, that is the last time I will be talking politics. Maybe I should form my own party. Hehehe.

I have another rant. Madonna. WTF? If I hear one more thing about her being Jewish I will scream. Just because she studies the Kabbalah doesn't make her Jewish!!!!!! That goes for all of the celebrities studying the Kabbalah. Repeat after me "I am not Jewish". Sorry, had to get that off my chest. I mean if they want to be Jewish, that's cool. Just convert. Go about it the right freaking way and for the right purpose.

Ok, I know this was totally pointless, but hey it is my blog! hehehe. Stay tuned for my next topic. Pixie's opinions of marriage. :)

Friday, June 03, 2005

Today was a good day..

In the words of Ice Cube, today was a good day. Orientation went rather well last night. I totally forgot that the mall closed a nine and not ten. I should know this considering how much time I actually spend in shopping malls. The girls that I was in orientation with were super nice. Of course I was the oldest one there! Hehehe.

I can't believe how much I actually accomplished today. I cleaned my house, got my laundry started, cleaned out the trash in my car and cleaned the windows, went to the bank, filled my tank up, made it to the mall for some work clothes, post office and made it to Fresh Market.

I was at the Post today and made some alarm go off with my super phone. The lady at the counter was like "you have a really strong, good phone!" As much as I paid for the damn thing it best have a great signal. Of course it's not like I have a $400 phone but I am cheap bitch and to me my phone is expensive. But I do love my phone.

I got some cute stuff today. I picked up a pair of light pink pants and a white top at the place I am working at. I am totally miffed because they are not carrying short anymore. The are offering hemming service. I swear the world is out to get us short people! I also picked up a black cami, appropriate for both work and going out! I got everything for 50% off, so I was pretty jazzed. I also picked up a black tee at the gap. I also got the cutest denim mini at Express. I had been eyeing it for awhile and it finally went on sale. Total score for me!

I was so surprised. I have been working out and all that. I am also back on my right dosage of synthroid. Well, I went from a 7 down to a 5 down to a 2. Well today, I actually had to buy a 0! I couldn't friggin believe it! I haven't done that since I was 21. Wow, amazing what fast food will do to your body. Ever since I have given up fast food I have felt so much better. I still have Wendy's burger or chicken sandwich though! Gotta love Wendy's!!!!!

I think I might download a couple of songs tonight. Then I am sitting my happy ass in front of the news and catching up on the world. I hope they find the girl in Aruba. I feel so sorry for her family. I am praying for her safe return.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Optimism is in the Air!

Ok, I just woke up in the most wonderful mood. I usually do but it feels great to be back to my perky self once again. I have been going around the house all humming and smiling. I am sure people think I must be on drugs when I am out and about. But do I care? NO!!! heheee

Well, I start my new job today and have no clue as what to expect. I hope the people I work with are not slackers. I hate working with slackers. I am one of these people who go into work and probably give a little to much. What can I say I am a perfectionist. Except when it comes to spelling and grammar. Ha! I also hope I don't work with a bunch of bitches. It is retail and of course it is all women. You know how catty us girls can get!

Well, D. Emailed me like nothing was going on today. I usually have no problem with forgiving my friends when we fight. Stuff happens but I am not ready to talk to him yet. I really don't know when I will be ready to tell the truth. He really irritated me.

I have been thinking of learning a foreign language but have no clue on which one I should take. I have taken Spanish before and was good at it. But I never used it enough for it to become permanent. I guess it would be a great advantage considering where I live and how many people speak Spanish. But I have always wanted to learn French. Decisions, decisions.

Well, for once I really don't have much to say. Just life is good and I hope it stays this way! Ciao!

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

A Norah Jones, James Taylor Night

Ok, I must say that yesterday was truly wretched. I thought the sky was going to fall at any moment because it couldn't possibly rain anymore! Now, rain usually doesn't bother me. But I drive an old car with no air. Very bad when one lives in South Florida indeed. So, I had to drive an hour to school in the rain unable to roll down my windows. To make matters worse I had to turn on the heat to keep the windows defogged. Seriously, I think I might have lost five pounds yesterday!

But to make things worse yesterday, I think I have lost a friend. I knew it was going to happen. But I had hoped for the best. My friend D. just wouldn't let up about his feelings after numerous talks that I would have with him. I feel really bad for him because it is hard when the one you desire doesn't desire you. I know everyone has been there. But poor old D. has never known a real relationship so he hasn't matured in that aspect.

So I get a text message yesterday saying how he didn't like me sleeping in the same room with my guy friends or going over to their house late at night. I was like okaaaaay. I also woke up to five voicemails on my phone. Very strange because they were all from him. So, I wrote an e-mail explaining that he was making this friendship hard at the moment, blah, blah.
Well, he just had to take it to the next level and talk about you treat people the way you want to be treated and he felt that as a potential boyfriend he wasn't treated right and that he needed space to figure out his feelings. He also said some other things in which he had no right in saying as a friend. I have no ideal where he got that I was a potential girlfriend. I am always open and honest with people. WTF? Do people just ignore what is being said to them or do they actually live in their own reality?
So after four years of friendship I guess it's over. Such a pity because I really do like him as person.

But today has been so much better. It has been a Sinatra day today. Not the sad Sinatra but the happy go lucky Sinatra. I took my procalc test and rocked it and have now turned in my nursing application. So in two weeks I will know!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so excited! It only gets better from here my friends........... mmmm....odd as I did a spell check Sinatra didn't come up as misspelled like most names. Go Frank.